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A Musafir explains his journey into the invitation of light

A Musafir explains his journey into the Invitation of Light
^{By: Salim Boykin-Mustaim, a new Khadim of 2008.}

January 20, 2008 – As a Catholic, I was raised in the city of “Brotherly Love.” Most of my family members are practicing devotees in various denominations of Christianity. As a child, I was sent to Catholic schools preparing me to meet academic and moral challenges that I would face in my not too distant future. Since childhood, I was always curious about the doctrine of Trinity. We were told to pray to Jesus, Mary and the Saints.

Whenever I had questioned a priest or a nun about my confusion regarding the first commandment that stated, “Thou shall not have any other God’s before God”, I was ignored and penalized for my curiosity. Sometimes I was forced to broom the entire school. One day, I came from school and told my mother about my treatment at school. After hearing the reason, she would punish me further. These instances instigated my thirst for the Living God. I wanted to be acquainted with the truth. Until this day, I hold nothing against the Catholic Church or my mother because without the religious foundation I received through the grace of God, I would not be who I am today. I am forever grateful, and love them all. It wasn't until early adulthood (18 yrs of age) that I received the message of Islam and became Muslim. Upon my awakening, I realized that Islam was everything that was within me, everything that I had always felt. A light began to shine and I did everything to keep that light as bright as I could over the years. When the light seemed to dim I would go to different extremes to find fuel to keep it burning, including associating myself with different communities in the realm of Islam.
During this phase of my journey, I came in contact with many believers upon different paths leading to the same destination. Due to the universality of Islam, I identified each path a potential to guide me to success in this world as well as the next world. But as my life went on, I noticed that there were some components missing. I began to feel out of place in some circles. These places condoned and tolerated haram acts. The back-biting and corruption that were present in these places became a deterrent for me in becoming involved with various activities, which would have otherwise helped me to grow spiritually. To avoid all of the chaos, I decided to get involved with a different path that gave me peace. My understanding increased under this new path, but the members were involved in the slaying of Nafs and the conquering of the ego that I became invisible. For example, I could come one week to the Mosque or miss two Jummahs, and no one will be concerned. For years, I was content with this and traveled the middle path knowing that this group was esoteric and mystified.
Some years later, I was searching on the Internet for Islamic web sites, and I came across the Ahmadiyya Muslim web site. The information that I came across was different than what I was used to, it seemed to completely answer some unanswered questions I had within my own soul. I would be up three to four in the morning, tapping into these new theories and concepts which dazzled my mind and seemed for some reason to ring true within my soul.
With all this new information, there was nowhere that I could turn too. I had fear of being labeled a kafir by my fellow Muslims, so I decided to go to check the local Ahmadiyya Mosque myself. I would go once every other month for Jummah Khutbah and felt love from these brothers, and eventually enrolled in their free Arabic class. During this time, I started witnessing the love and compassion between the members. The deepest part about it all was that they extended this brotherly affection to me!
Sometime after the third or fourth month of my instruction in Arabic, My work schedule changed and I had to temporarily discontinue the classes and it took about a year before I returned….

The Invitation
The following year I was being overwhelmed by the despondency of the fact that many of my spiritual brothers and sisters were falling victims to the accursed whisperer and being involved in some form or another in haram activities. I had to break some ties for fear that their dealings would affect me in some way or another. My prayer to Allah became a request that He would place believing people around me who could be my companions on the Unerring Path. It seemed everywhere I turned except for a few righteous brothers, many brothers were missing spirituality.
In the midst of a financial challenge dealing with my automobile, I began saying prayers on my beads in a cab contemplating the bounties of Allah and asking His Guidance. When I had gotten out of the cab, there was an Ahmadi brother across the street (Brother Iliyas Ibrahim) who was happy to see me and gave me an invitation to Jalsa Salana 2007. He told me it would be a very good opportunity to see what the Ahmadiyyah Community was really like in three days. Immediately, I sought into my pocket feeling my limited finances at the time, I was convinced that I could not afford it. I pursued to ask the cost of the trip. It didn't seem real to me at the time. I was offered free travel and lodging? There has to be a catch! But there was no catch.
From the time I had arrived with the other brothers, I was able to witness thousands of brothers treating each other with love. The pugnacious attitudes of those I had formerly known from other communities were not present in this group. I expected suspicion but found no traces of that either. I was able to get the message of Ahmadiyyah without interruption and distractions simply by observing these brothers. I did not even feel any racial discrimination among this crowd which was highly unusual as compared to anywhere else in

America . Most of all, the Pakistani cuisine was tasty, nutritious and good. I returned home with a new insight into what the Ahmadiyyah believed as well as what they practiced.

Although I felt motivated enough to join at this time, I did not because I felt I should investigate further. But the more I learned about the Messiah (as) the more reasons began to overwhelm me to join. My heart began to speak to me when everything was still. The close people around me reported to me the change that they could see in me, a change for the better. Although officially I had not become an Ahmadi Muslim yet, I was one to the core in my own eyes. I would debate with Muslim family members in an attempt to help them to see the truth that I was seeing, but with squinted eyes it seemed the light that this truth brought with it was too bright for them. I noticed my dreams began to change also. Instead of dreams centering on conflict, my dreams began to introduce me to a peaceful mind by showing me images of people who had benevolence in their hearts and the places in the dreams began to be brighter from a larger than normal sun that was above us. I prayed day and night for Allah to guide me and it became evident that he was guiding me all along. Once this realization set in, I accepted, signed Bai’it and hoped and prayed that Allah will make my faith as strong as the faith of those faithful Ahmadi Muslims who are being persecuted around the world. It was the “Brotherly Love” that I was born into that was evident at Jalsa Salana 2007. Jalsa Salana 2007 was the marker for which I signed Bai’it two weeks in December 2007. May Allah (swa) help us against the disbelieving people, and shower us with His Blessings forever -Amin

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